What to say… (Onomatopoeia)

What am I to say…

Rendered speechless, though I draw from every word from my vocabulary… the scribblings in my mind go from complete thoughts to complete gibberish…

Left with the gum like density of licorice at my lips…

They stick together and refuse to part… not that I wish not to part with the words, for if I am speaking them to you they are mine to give and they no longer belong to me as they are properties of you…

Yet it is the very properties of you… which bring about silence… are the simplest things that most ignore for they see you and can only say easily, the many wondrous things run skin deep, for that is as far as they are willing to travel and are trying to get there in a hurry…

… but I know time is only a factor when you are afraid of losing it… so I will take my time…. and if along my way to touch your soul, my words become lost… be mindful that I am not…

For it is upon you that my eyes fall to see reasons to pick myself up and continue on…

Absent of a single word to flatter, parched from the long journey and ready to tell you that at the very sight of you…

GASP!!!

What am I to say…

 

The Unspoken Word

Be the life of the party…

Or be the center of my universe and I will be the man who places his hand on the small of your back…

Giving reason to excuse yourself from being the center of attention as I whisper in your ear how beautiful you are when you’re being yourself as I walk away…

You don’t quite hear me, so you follow me outside and find me staring upward…

No one is outside but the two of us…

You join me and ask what I said but not a single word falls from my lips, I only pull you closer and let my hand find its way back to the small of your back…

There is not much to see in a night sky with the glare of street lights fighting nature, but every so often you can find one star that makes it all worth while…

And when you do, the rest of the world seems to fade away…

If only for a moment we float in the night air, that is the moment in which I will repeat what I said…

You’ll smile, make every star jealous and the entire world will go black…

We share a kiss… … … …

The feeling exchanged is a word that need not be spoken…

Writer’s Block

Waiting for words to find me… I sit still, allowing my thoughts to race…

Competing for the ultimate prize of “the point of inspiration”… but my carefree mind wanders, switching worlds randomly so the paths of words to the motioning of  my wrists to which I write them is indirect…

Yet I compose myself by whispering compose yourself and then reply with notes that are the pieces of the chords struck within me…

What falls to the page and to the screen sometimes even shocks me…

And I am shown often what I did not even know about myself that is imbedded in my soul whenever I give back to my soul instead of constantly asking of it…

Hush (You See Nothing…)

What is this hush and its layered textures?

Humbling sounds of walking alone folding unto themselves to reveal the deepest need to understand… and with not a moments rest, we continue on…

Journeys through what seems like endless days and eternal nights with no knowledge of when all of this began nor possess the image of when it will come to an end…

In the between we can see:

The times smiles graced our faces and those when we cried where the tears tanned our cheeks…

Moments when he had the courage to love and those where are broken hearts built walls around themselves so not to be hurt once more…

Which lead to the most intimate junctures of solitude… and those gnashing feelings of guilt for wanting to be alone, but not without those feelings of wanting to be…

We see the past and make it present and give these gifts to ourselves…

Yet we cannot see everything… our gifts are imperfect…

But if you are reading this, then you can see… which means you can breathe… which means you are alive…

That hushed silence… is the calming of the soul…

When you have no answers but peace has become you… your mind is drawn blank, but your heart is full…

Be faithful that you are being watched every step of your way…

Tears (Measures of a human life)

All grown up…

It would be unwise to assume that all there is to know has been shed upon me…

I rub my face and look into the mirror, to see my own eyes staring back at me asking the same question that I beckon an the answer from my reflection…

Where has all the time gone?

The silence in the room is only broken once my soul begins to shift, yet I remain still… waiting patiently for an answer…

I stare until the surface of what everyone sees disappears… there are only two sets of very familiar eyes staring back into one another… dark brown portals with staircases leading to the depths of the soul…

At the bottom of those staircases are corridors to traverse years of travel in an intimate moment of solitude… It’s been well over twelve-thousand days… My feet and ankles ache, but not more than my heart when I ask the question…

How far have I come? And do not have an answer…

I see the grooves in my soul from walking in circles…

and it breaks my heart…

Then crushed by waves my body floods, I’m forced out of my trance and brought back to being face to face with myself in the mirror…

A tear rolls down my face… the room is silent but the onslaught of living my dreams whispers that I am free to do so; so long as I look at where I wish to go by saying…

Your life is immeasurable by any man, even yourself…

Just be willing to go the distance…

and a tear rolled down my face…

and I smiled.

Say Nothing (Say Everything)

Through yonder window breaks a mixture of moonbeams and streetlight…

The chill in the evening air freezes my thoughts and I am uncertain of what to say…

Yet no obstacles exist t hat would hinder me from reaching across the sofa with my gaze to touch you before my hands reach out and do the same…

Still I sit looking at you locked in perpetual exchange of unspoken emotion… and haven’t the faintest clue what you are not saying, but it means the world to me all the same…

Roaring silence of not saying the right thing…  broken by opening the of hearts and speaking the words they conduct…

For they always seem to know exactly what they want, need… desire and are unafraid to say so…

Speak low…

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Intimate moments of silence sit between whispers of the soul when the body is at rest… when we close our eyes and try to clear our minds…think about the day, only to lose our presence in the night…

The opportunity to catch fireflies and moonbeams… open your eyes and be my lover and I your dreamer…

A connection far from illusion… reaching out without a frog singing a song… but if there were we’d both look and become lost in the sweet dissonance of twangs and a river running beneath us…

How sweet life is when you taste it… search for a succulent to prick yourself awake hoping that the succulence of your experience never leaves your lips… that it never leaves your life… I could lose myself in the way you see me…

Hydrogen & Oxygen (Agua)

It will take much more than two parts to one to sustain me…

To keep my eyes dancing in the light reflected from you, to fill my mind with so much reality… that fantasy is nothing compared.

To usher words that upon uttering from my lips, flow so easily that they are of fabric seamless and warm by their very nature…

To not even tell a joke but trigger my humor and make me laugh make me smile… to keep my temperature down but my blood surging with heat and passion…

For you to be like water… adapt to me… I’m thirsty…

Mementos (Time Capsule)

The charm of any keepsake is the closeness that it bears to the heart…

Lockets containing pictures with messages enscribed on the back proclaiming love and dedication… get passed along and tell a story to be passed along… and its been way past a long time for you to begin one of your own… 

It’s in your eyes past what everyone can see… the beginning of something beautiful… the warm beginning of a record releasing the crackles of a kindling fire in which you dance to your favorite song, you relax at the end of your day and even if playing in the background…

its still there… and at the end you turn it over and listen even deeper until you have to do so again… and again… and again…

a joy to hear… you are listening… to pages turning in photo albums of things that happened and will happen… they draw you into remembrance… take hold of the present and make you gaze at your love becoming lost in the future…

What is within us that although as old as time itself always tastes so sweet, as warm as something new, a story … a song that no matter how many times you’ve heard it… never gets old…ageless… timeless… antique… vintage… love.

Serene (You Are Loved)

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There are times to be remembered… that when your soul compels you to be present and most important of all… to become lost and alone with them…

Each moment that you were present… is where if anyone should be looking for you, it is there that they will find you…

Neither lost nor exactly alone…

Perhaps during a difficult time, where you are sitting across from your mother… you have no clue as to what to do, but something within her says that she should utter just how much you are loved…

It is only a memory, but in times of need you can remember it and practically not only hear but see the words cross over her lips and sink into your soul… calming your heart…

If one were to listen closely… they could hear your heartbeat and find you… they may travel a distance and possibly have been for some time… there may be debris of hurt and regrets, but be assured he will come…

And he will see you…

Looking into eyes much like your own… knowing that nothing short of the absence of life itself can cause you to part… you both shed years when you met… your heart was calm and something that your mother said to you, seems all that more familiar… she said it before times were rough…

You… living for much more than yourself, wondering if you can be seen in this place…

But when is it, that you haven’t been seen? Or better yet not heard?

No call for panic… steady yourself…

For even though clouds form and it begins to rain… the downpour of sadness from without you that strike the ground with its pitter patter pattern attempting to mask the beating of your heart… will not compare to the mirth that can flood your soul…

True your heart may have been beaten… but still it beats and rest assured it is heard… you are still here and the message of love sent to you came way before the first moment you cried out…

Now you listen to your heartbeat…

This is how you know… no matter what… you are always loved…

This is your moment to remember…

This is your peace…

(4LC)