Category Archives: life

Darkness (an ode to you being away)

Posted on by under chicago, dreams, heart, intimacy, life, love, memories, night, poems, Poetry, writings

My closing eyes…

Remove me from the light outside… and as the darkness cradles me, give way for my whispers to romance my memories with images of you during your absence…

The vividness almost real enough to touch, though my hands do not reach out to grasp and instead find their way to my chest… Establishing a connection to my heart because that is where you are…

Such an intimate moment has no words, yet I wish you were near to see me try to form speech… But if you were my telling of how I miss you might not be as sweet… And the delicacy of you repeating those words may not sugar your lips that I will savor once in your presence…

So for now dreams will have to do… In the darkness… And I will wait for the day where my eyes fall upon you…

Untitled #5

Posted on by under chicago, life, poems, Poetry, time, traveling, writings

I’m not a time traveler
All things in the past are exactly where they were left…

Each having a unique thumb print on my life… I can feel their touch and remember them vividly as if they happened yesterday… 

Even though with some years have gone by, with closed eyes in the darkness I am there… If only but for a moment, I am there…

In a sea of memories that I would never trade, for in swimming their past my currents became stronger… They made me…

Here I now stand… Not bound by them but free of them… placing my hands into the future because I’ve already traveled my past and this waves are behind me.

Surrender

Posted on by under chicago, connection, heart, life, love, memories, poems, Poetry, writings

Time has passed and looking around… there is no physical trace of your presence.

Where the time has gone I often search for… tearing up every corner of my mind as if I have lost it…

Time…

Only it was never lost but willfully handed over because I spent it with you and it was worth it…

And now you are gone… neither I or you are in the same place any longer and the longer I sit and think of you, this place screams your name…

Yet it is only silence that echoes and that alone causes me to fight back tears…

And I miss you…

Yet I wouldn’t change the moment that I met you, so that this would never come to be…

Where I am… I have to question because no matter where I am, in truth I am hiding away in my heart looking out onto a world without you… Not having to even think of where you are because your memory is here with me…

And here I am… Just now listening to everything that you have ever said in the past… Speechless to respond because I should have listened then… And now you are too far away to hear me…

There is not a physical trace of you, but your essence is…

Carillons à Musique (Silence)

Posted on by under heart, life, love, poems, Poetry

The world rages on… though you needn’t fear…

Hush…

What I hear shall not fall upon you… but the lullaby of my heart beating will resonate to yours… providing the only reason you will ever find tears, that do not come from pain…

Speak not…

For there is not a single word that need pass between us, while my arms hold you close that could even begin to describe what I wish for you to know…

Feel…

The water from my eyes that are extracted from the very center of my unselfishness (… you are so beautiful…) and let them wash you over, but never away….

I am yours… you are mine…

Forever I will love you…

 

 

Steam (Human Machines)

Posted on by under life, Poetry

I am not a machine…

I cry, breathe, love… bleed…

Worked to the bone… see me breakdown…

In need of a mechanic and a surgeon because my parts no longer wish to work… and my heart murmurs what was once a strong thump…

I question my existence…

Only to listen to the silence that falls upon me that leaves me without an answer to my inquiry…

My thoughts and I wait alone… and the weight of being alone weighs more than one can stand… the pressure builds up… I break down…

But am far from broken… I just need a release…

I am only human…

The Unspoken Word

Posted on by under chicago, heart, life, love, Party, Poetry, writings

Be the life of the party…

Or be the center of my universe and I will be the man who places his hand on the small of your back…

Giving reason to excuse yourself from being the center of attention as I whisper in your ear how beautiful you are when you’re being yourself as I walk away…

You don’t quite hear me, so you follow me outside and find me staring upward…

No one is outside but the two of us…

You join me and ask what I said but not a single word falls from my lips, I only pull you closer and let my hand find its way back to the small of your back…

There is not much to see in a night sky with the glare of street lights fighting nature, but every so often you can find one star that makes it all worth while…

And when you do, the rest of the world seems to fade away…

If only for a moment we float in the night air, that is the moment in which I will repeat what I said…

You’ll smile, make every star jealous and the entire world will go black…

We share a kiss… … … …

The feeling exchanged is a word that need not be spoken…

Hush (You See Nothing…)

Posted on by under breathe, calm down, chicago, faith, good morning, life, live, love, meditate, meditation, poems, Poetry, tea, time, writings

What is this hush and its layered textures?

Humbling sounds of walking alone folding unto themselves to reveal the deepest need to understand… and with not a moments rest, we continue on…

Journeys through what seems like endless days and eternal nights with no knowledge of when all of this began nor possess the image of when it will come to an end…

In the between we can see:

The times smiles graced our faces and those when we cried where the tears tanned our cheeks…

Moments when he had the courage to love and those where are broken hearts built walls around themselves so not to be hurt once more…

Which lead to the most intimate junctures of solitude… and those gnashing feelings of guilt for wanting to be alone, but not without those feelings of wanting to be…

We see the past and make it present and give these gifts to ourselves…

Yet we cannot see everything… our gifts are imperfect…

But if you are reading this, then you can see… which means you can breathe… which means you are alive…

That hushed silence… is the calming of the soul…

When you have no answers but peace has become you… your mind is drawn blank, but your heart is full…

Be faithful that you are being watched every step of your way…

Tears (Measures of a human life)

Posted on by under chicago, faith, heart, joy, life, living, Poetry, tears, time, writings

All grown up…

It would be unwise to assume that all there is to know has been shed upon me…

I rub my face and look into the mirror, to see my own eyes staring back at me asking the same question that I beckon an the answer from my reflection…

Where has all the time gone?

The silence in the room is only broken once my soul begins to shift, yet I remain still… waiting patiently for an answer…

I stare until the surface of what everyone sees disappears… there are only two sets of very familiar eyes staring back into one another… dark brown portals with staircases leading to the depths of the soul…

At the bottom of those staircases are corridors to traverse years of travel in an intimate moment of solitude… It’s been well over twelve-thousand days… My feet and ankles ache, but not more than my heart when I ask the question…

How far have I come? And do not have an answer…

I see the grooves in my soul from walking in circles…

and it breaks my heart…

Then crushed by waves my body floods, I’m forced out of my trance and brought back to being face to face with myself in the mirror…

A tear rolls down my face… the room is silent but the onslaught of living my dreams whispers that I am free to do so; so long as I look at where I wish to go by saying…

Your life is immeasurable by any man, even yourself…

Just be willing to go the distance…

and a tear rolled down my face…

and I smiled.

Hydrogen & Oxygen (Agua)

Posted on by under acceptance, chicago, life, love, poems, Poetry, thirsty, water, writings

It will take much more than two parts to one to sustain me…

To keep my eyes dancing in the light reflected from you, to fill my mind with so much reality… that fantasy is nothing compared.

To usher words that upon uttering from my lips, flow so easily that they are of fabric seamless and warm by their very nature…

To not even tell a joke but trigger my humor and make me laugh make me smile… to keep my temperature down but my blood surging with heat and passion…

For you to be like water… adapt to me… I’m thirsty…

Mementos (Time Capsule)

Posted on by under chicago, good morning, life, living, love, memories, music, poems, Poetry, time, vintage, writings

The charm of any keepsake is the closeness that it bears to the heart…

Lockets containing pictures with messages enscribed on the back proclaiming love and dedication… get passed along and tell a story to be passed along… and its been way past a long time for you to begin one of your own… 

It’s in your eyes past what everyone can see… the beginning of something beautiful… the warm beginning of a record releasing the crackles of a kindling fire in which you dance to your favorite song, you relax at the end of your day and even if playing in the background…

its still there… and at the end you turn it over and listen even deeper until you have to do so again… and again… and again…

a joy to hear… you are listening… to pages turning in photo albums of things that happened and will happen… they draw you into remembrance… take hold of the present and make you gaze at your love becoming lost in the future…

What is within us that although as old as time itself always tastes so sweet, as warm as something new, a story … a song that no matter how many times you’ve heard it… never gets old…ageless… timeless… antique… vintage… love.